Where do I even begin to try and explain my rather unordinary complicated childhood and how it has contributed to who I am? Let me start by being straightforward and say that my childhood was not like most of ours, nor was I like any other kid. The ‘small’ things in life contributed to who I am today, but it was the ‘bigger’ things in life that really ‘created’ me. My family life growing up was a little hectic and messy. I have three older half sisters (although we do not look at it that way) in which we have the same mother. My mother divorced their father, met mine, had me, and married my father. When I was in fourth grade, they divorced. To make my childhood and family life more chaotic, my father left after I decided to live with mom full time in 2005 and I have not heard from him since. Throughout all this chaos, my mother repeatedly told my sisters and I one thing: we will always have each other. I was taught the importance of family at a young age, which has helped form the strong, special relationships I have with my family, especially my mother and sisters. Because I was taught the importance of family at such a young age and since I was so close to my sisters, I was unlike most kids and did not long for ‘school’ friends outside of my family. I was content. Divorce takes a toll on finances so for a while, my mother struggled raising four kids without child support. My chaotic family life taught my sisters and I to be accepting of others. We were taught not to judge others. I appreciate life and am thankful. Although my childhood and family life was very different from most, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I am not ashamed or embarrassed by my past, nor do I dwell in it and expect others to feel sorry for me. The bigger things in life helped define who I am as a person today; the smaller thing just played a minor role. So what my family life is extremely complicated; it greatly contributed to who I am today. My life is a complicated grand narrative that is yet to be defined.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
It couldn't get much more complicated than this...
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I know exactly where you are coming from. My parents also divorced when I was very young (first grade for me). Looking back , I realize that my family was always there for me, especially my brother and how important they were in my development.
ReplyDeleteIt's amazing to think how many people experience situations similar to ours, where divorce is common for families. It's also interesting to consider the effect the increased divorce rate will have on the conception of family and the idea that functional families have to be "nuclear" (e.g. two parent households).